Thankful...
It’s been a long time since I posted to this blog, but while grieving over the loss of my mother, I decided to jot down some of my thoughts. So, here goes.
Possibly, these writings are only for me. On the other hand, it could be that at some point, someone is drawn to this blog who is also hurting. Hopefully, this will make sense to you, if you’re here.
In reading II Corinthians 1 – I am reminded here that God truly does care about our suffering and heartache. I know HE is at work in the midst of a life that seems out of ‘my’ control. Verse 4 says He ‘comforts us in all our troubles and sufferings.’ Though many times I pray for deliverance, I know that He will deliver us from evil, but doesn’t necessarily always deliver us from trouble. He only promises to be with us in our times of trouble and difficulty. Suffering is certainly no accident to His plan, but is rather His perfect plan for my life. I wouldn’t necessarily say that I am suffering, but I am heartbroken with the loss of my mother. Others have experienced the same loss. Yet, in my self pity, I feel that I must miss her more than any other has missed her mother. Man, I miss her!
I am thankful for the comfort that only HE can give me, however. I am thankful that He continues to draw me to Himself. For there, I find comfort. I know that I will see my mother again. I know that at that time, she will take me to Him and I shall behold Him. I am sure I will fall before Him. I am thankful…yes, in the midst of this heartache…I am thankful.
We must cling to Him during these times like never before. No matter how hard it is to consider it all ‘pure joy’, we must choose to believe. Though we feel like it is pure MISERY, we must ask for wisdom and faith. God has blessed me in so many ways – so many times – so many ways. It makes it hard sometimes to see through this cloud of grief. But I must remember His blessings, and know that even through the grief He is leading me.
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does" (James 1:2-8)
I choose to stand firm on His Word, knowing that He will not let me down. He will not forsake me. I “cast all my cares on Him, for He cares for me”. (I Peter)
I am thankful...